dammit IGGY!

mommer is FURRY peevish wif igmu. he grabbed the last bite of the left-ofur lasagna she was eatin' fur breffus yesterday--right offa her plate. she was holdin' the plate up offa the table wif her left hand acawse edmund was close enuf to breafe onnit. she thot she was keepin' it safe, but then she reached for her coffee wif her right hand, an' iggy shoved right past ed, almost knockin' him offa the table. he knew mommer couldn't clout him while her ofur hand was busy wif the coffee, so he grabbed the bite (wif alla the cheese onnit! mommer was REAL mad about THAT), then dragged it to the floor behint the table where he growled at an' smacky-pawed at the dbd while chewin' madly. the dbd made him give up some of it an' got a morsel or two herself--an' that's how the carpet got yechhhhh'd up. mommer sez there useta be a talky-box program called "get smart" where they had a "cone of silence". she wants someone to invent a "cone of cat impermeability", whutefur that is.

alla this took place just as mommer was gettin' ready to go to werk, so she said bad werds while she got out the spotbot. alla the spots were far enuf apart that she hadda run it three seperit times, so it made her really late. forchunately, all her bossman asks for when yer late is a good story, an' she came well prepared.

(oh, yeah; we also lerned that iggy's parents WEREN'T MARRIED!!!! mommer mentioned that several times.)