28 February 2008

KITTY RIGHTS

IMPORTANT NOTE: in view of the current contretemps between zoey an’ maggy an’ the zoolatry beans (an’ the many ofur indignities an’ cruelties that has been visited upon us kitties in the past), we finks there should be a KITTY BILL OF RIGHTS or a KITTY CATSTITUTION to spell this out once an’ fur all. if you sends us your suggestions, we will moosh them into one document an’ publish them. deadline is wednesday, 5 march, an’ we will try to haf them publishable on feline friday of that week if our secretary doesn’t get ofurwhelmed an’ require sedation. if you does send somefing in, you agrees that we has the right to edit it for clarity an’ brevity. c’mon, gals ‘n’ guys–we are NOT second-class citizens–we are FIRST CLASS CATIZENS!!!

(signed)
Nelson John LaPurr
Sir Edmund Percival Hillary
Nitro S Pierce
Xing-Lu (XingXing) Pierce

14 comments:

Daisy said...

We must have the right to keep and bear our claws, and this right must not be infringed upon with claw-trimmers of any sort.

The Tower Hill Mob said...

We are superior beings. All other, lesser, species must learn to deal with that fact.

Derby said...

We kitties have the right to nap in peace without flashy boxes in our faces.

All cats are created equal

Cheysuli and gemini said...

I promise to uphold this constitution when I am elected president of the United States!

Oh and I'd like to add in something about having the right to be worshipped as we please.

The Meezers said...

we kitties have the right to have as much ham and tem-tay-shuns as we desire.

Lux said...

We kitties have the right to have all the cabinet doors left open at all times.

Tyler said...

We have the right to daily playtime with our beans.

Hot(M)BC said...

Standing on kitty tails is punishable by somefing icky.

Forty Paws said...

We have the right to walk on any surface we please, sleep anywhere we please, and groom our claws anywhere we please.

Luf, Us

Karen Jo said...

Kitties have the right to breakfast on demand, not when the beans finally decide to pull themselves out of bed.

Diamond Emerald-Eyes said...

I have the right to have Temptations and other treats without having to work for them. I have the right to have good foods in my food bowls when I want it. I have the right to have nip upon request. I have the right to go outside without snoopervision, as long as I do not get into any trouble and come home when called. I have the right to kill mice and other prey as I see fit and not to have them "saved" by squeemish humans.

Magoo, Smudge, Bella & Dolce said...

No gov or mint shall infringe our freedom to screech.

The Crew said...

We should be able have as much food as we want, when we want it, without a human telling us we're getting FAT!!!

As The Squillion World Spins said...

Us Squillions need rights, too! Just because we are not of the furry or live persuasion, doesn't mean we don't have any! We should have all the rights that our live cat cousins have.
Bernard Jameson
President of the FL Squillion Clan