23 August 2011
this is what he did last week (go ahead an' biggify to get the full effect). it's a good thing that daddy woked up to make coffees when he did. the back room where this lectric tool battery charger sat had a layer of nasty-smellin' smoke floatin' up at the ceilin'. it smelled awful an' we hollered an' hollered an' hollered at him to get up, but he kep' hollerin' back SHUT THE ____ UP like he usually does acause he thought we wanted to be fed, an' he knew mommer had already fed us an' he thought we were tryin' to wangle second helpins. when he DID finely get up, you can't imagine how quick he hopped around, feelin' the wall fur heat, runnin' outside to see if there was smoke an' flame, runnin' up the attic stairs to look for danger, whippin' open windows, turnin' on the attic fan, an' tarnishin' the welkin all the while.
inna mean time, ed sat calmly an' watched all the activity with his usual mild detachment. oncet upon a time, miss ginger an' mr gary an' mommer an' dad were sittin' around the kitchen table, tryin' to describe us cats (their four an' us) each wif just one word. mommer decided that "bemused" fit edmund the best, since he just allus seems vaguely surprised an' slightly disconnected from reality (except when whippin' the snot outta some kitteh who has disturbed his bemusement). hmmmm ... "disconnected". izzn't that what happens to electric cords? honesly, we dunno why he hasn't been disconnected pernamently, an' we tries to guard against it; does enny of you cats out there haff this prollem? what does yer beans do about it?
NB: when mom got up a little while afters, the smokes was gone but the smell still lingered. she pried open ed's mouf to see if there was enny ouchies, but there was nary a one. she sed, "well, i allus believed the lord looks out fur drunks an' fools--an' i guess i know which one YOU are, edmundo."