i can has tato chips!, originally uploaded by olrebbie.
if his daddy is eatin' it, HE's gonna try some!
Adventures of four kitties of disparate backgrounds (Nitro S Pierce, Xing Lu, Igmu Sapa, & DammitJim) residing in one house with two 2-leggers (Dad & Mommer) and a lesser 4-legger (dog Cocoa). Oddly enough, all 4-leggers share the first name, "DAMMIT!" (One moreso than the others.)
22 December 2008
21 December 2008
a blood-freezin' deer tale!!!
if there is any lingering question on the vishusness of deers, let this put it to rest. it is a blood-curdlin' story sent by aunty marilyn to our mom--written by a bean who has a farm in kansas. we suspects it must be a true story acause--well, GOSH! it was onna innernets. WE're onna innernets, an' WE're true!!
I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregated at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.
I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope. The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it. After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them.
I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.
I took a step towards it... it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and received an education.
The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED.
The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope with some dignity. A deer, no chance.
That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I originally imagined.
The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.
At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope. I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.
Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand . . . kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in there and started moving up so I could get my rope back.
Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head -- almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.
The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it.
While I kept it busy tearing the bejeebers out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day. Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp.
I learned a long time ago that when an animal like a horse strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise, and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.
This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.
The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.
Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head. I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.
!!!!yung, joosy kats and those wif week stummicks need read no furrther!!!!
I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregated at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.
I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope. The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it. After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them.
I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.
I took a step towards it... it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and received an education.
The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED.
The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope with some dignity. A deer, no chance.
That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I originally imagined.
The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.
At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope. I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.
Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand . . . kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in there and started moving up so I could get my rope back.
Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head -- almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.
The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it.
While I kept it busy tearing the bejeebers out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day. Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp.
I learned a long time ago that when an animal like a horse strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise, and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.
This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.
The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.
Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head. I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.
19 December 2008
nitro is takin' ofur
takin' ofur nels's job as guardian of the catsmas tree, that is. he better do a good job. we're waitin' to see how this works out, since he's the one most likely to chase xing up it!!17 December 2008
THIS is how you be an elf--CHILLAXIN'
catsmas tree report: STILL STANDING!!
sidebar report: still at the bottom. anycat know howta fix this????
sidebar report: still at the bottom. anycat know howta fix this????
16 December 2008
does anycat see our sidebar???
if not, does ya gots any clues where it went??? CALL CCSI!!!! HALLLLLLP!!! mom is astreemly provoked!
UPDATE: thanks, dana an' meezer guys!! now all we need is to figger out how it got down there an' how to get it back. any suggestions from the more techie cats or beans??
oh, an' mom sez she's proud of us--the catsmas tree survived its first night. now we'll see what happens during the day! xing sleeps in her room an' cocoa sleeps inna beans' den at night, so things should be more aciting today! ;-D
UPDATE: thanks, dana an' meezer guys!! now all we need is to figger out how it got down there an' how to get it back. any suggestions from the more techie cats or beans??
oh, an' mom sez she's proud of us--the catsmas tree survived its first night. now we'll see what happens during the day! xing sleeps in her room an' cocoa sleeps inna beans' den at night, so things should be more aciting today! ;-D
15 December 2008
elves in training . . .
xing sez: i enjoyed my part in ccsi (WHICH STARTS HERE!!!! TODAY!!!!) everso much more than this silliness, but *sigh*, it's exposure, an' i guess if i'm gonna be a nactresscat, i'm gonna hafta put up wif it.
nitro sez: mmmmmph!
ed sez: i think they need a little christmas spirit seminar;-)
nitro sez: mmmmmph!ed sez: i think they need a little christmas spirit seminar;-)
12 December 2008
rescuer needs rescuing . . .
Swedish man rescued from tree
Posted on: Thursday, 11 December 2008, 11:00 CST
A Swedish man said the fire department had to be called for a rescue after he followed his cat up a tree and was unable to get down.
The Kristineberg, Sweden, man said he climbed the tree Wednesday after his cat had been stuck for several days and panicked when he found himself about 50 feet above the ground, The Local reported Thursday. The man said he called emergency services after he found himself unable to climb down due to fear of the height.
It was kind of a funny assignment and certainly out of the ordinary. Once he was way up in the tree, the man didn't dare to come down,
emergency worker Torbjorn Nilsson told The Local.
Nilsson said the situation had a happy ending for both man and cat.
First we took down the cat, then the guy,
said Nilsson. Everything ended well.
09 December 2008
DON'T FURRGET . . .
CCSI IV IS COMING SOON TO A COMPUTER NEAR YOU!!!!
(almost starring xing lu!!)
marvy poster courtesy of karl!
(almost starring xing lu!!)
marvy poster courtesy of karl!01 December 2008
retro-vision: sunday on monday
our first snows pattered down today, but they weren't doin' a furry good job of stickin' to stuff. however, it was grey an' gloomy, an' just right for multiple naps in the warmth of the woodstove. fur once, mom got to take a picture of dad an' his nap buddies (although mom sez she'll take all three meowers ofur one cocoa anyday). an' good thing, too; acause she got all three of us after she got the roast beast stew cookin' an' she came in to watch the talky-box.we all needed extra sleep acause mom an' dad moved alla our comfy chairs outta the warm room an' into ofur rooms yesterday, an' then some guy brought a giant two-headed rug sucker to our house an' rug-sucked for what woulda been squillions of naps, except nocat could sleep on accounta the noise. when he was done an' alla the comfy chairs was back where they belonged, efurrywhere smelled funny an' not furry much like xena or nels (or any of us, for that matter) anymore. the new smell isn't bad, it just ain't familyer. we can take care of THAT! ;-)
27 November 2008
happy thanksgiving!
best fishes from alla us meowers--
ed, nitro, an' xingxing (an' mom, dad, an' cocoa!)
20 November 2008
now they HAFTA respect me!
it's me, it's me, furriends!! xingxing!! i'm all excited 'cause i'm gonna be in the CCSI IV production that's comin' up--the Momomo Caper!! the talented an' lovely miss sassy sent me this beautyful badge to show that i'm part of it!! now those rotten boycat brofurs hafta admit that i really haf star-quality, that i'm not just a whiny girlcat, that i'm on my way to fame an' fortune. many, many, many thanks to Karl, Ruis, Sassy, Opus, Asta, & Momo for my big chance!!what? what did you say, nitro? the camera adds 10 lbs? well, sure, if you're carryin' it--some of 'em are pretty big, but . . . what? no!!! no!!! that's not true!!! i KNOW it's not true!!! ***LALALALALALALALACAN'THEARYOULALALALALALALALALACAN'THEARYOU***
(running feets) Mama!Mama! nitro sez i'm gonna be fat onna CCSI program--you KNOW i'm not fat!!! i know i'm not fat!! i'm furry dainty an' has small princessy feets, too!! he's lyin', he's lyin', he's just jealous, i know he is!!! he din't get asked to be on CCSI like i did, an' he's just sayin' that to be mean 'cause that's how he is, he's just
*sniff*
*drool* mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. catnip. *roll* *roll* *drool*
ahhhhh. *ladylike snore* *several more . . . * *deep, dreamless sleep*
(crisis averted--mom wonders, is this what "herbal lady" means?)
18 November 2008
while mom was in chicago,
grampa had his eyes surgeried, an' the clawcoma pressure's back where it should be, so that's good. but we can't tell yet if the catarak operation did any good acause there's a 7-10 day healing time. mom's not so sure grampa's gonna get through that wifout troubles, acause he's sposdta wear a pirate patch, an' he keeps pullin' it off an' hidin' it in his pocket. so we is just hopin' he don't get no feckshuns. we fanks you all fur your kindly thoughts an' purrs an' purrrayers--they worked really good, acause it's hard to haf an uneventful operation on a bean who's 95 squillion naps old. an' they worked good on gramma, too, acause she din't freak out a lot about the whole deal. mom was almost more worried about that than about grampa!
an' while she was gone, we were each an' efurry one of us furry good, so she brought us goodies frum a furpersons' BOO-TEEK called scratch 'n' sniff (an' told us not to get useta such high-falutin' vittles). (well, they prolly won't let her back in there anyways, since she says she spent the whole time LOLin'.) cocoa went to the day hunting place wif dad efurry day, so she gots the t-shirt woofie cookie that's even gots frostin! the lamb & liver treats are fur anofur day.
we, of course, were our usual mild-mannered selfs, so we got the bonito flakes. but then we got inna fight ofur them when daddy opened the jar. we know why they went missin' at skeezix & mao's house!! we doesn't know what "herrings" are, but mom sez they're chewier than "earrings", so we fink we'll like them. we gets to try them tonight.
an' gramma gave mom this really kyoot purse for christmas (acause mom & dad prolly won't be able to visit her then). she allus finds really neat kitty stuff for mom even though she can't use the innernets to shop, so we guesses there must really BE a world outside our virtual one . . . ;-D
an' while she was gone, we were each an' efurry one of us furry good, so she brought us goodies frum a furpersons' BOO-TEEK called scratch 'n' sniff (an' told us not to get useta such high-falutin' vittles). (well, they prolly won't let her back in there anyways, since she says she spent the whole time LOLin'.) cocoa went to the day hunting place wif dad efurry day, so she gots the t-shirt woofie cookie that's even gots frostin! the lamb & liver treats are fur anofur day.
we, of course, were our usual mild-mannered selfs, so we got the bonito flakes. but then we got inna fight ofur them when daddy opened the jar. we know why they went missin' at skeezix & mao's house!! we doesn't know what "herrings" are, but mom sez they're chewier than "earrings", so we fink we'll like them. we gets to try them tonight.
an' gramma gave mom this really kyoot purse for christmas (acause mom & dad prolly won't be able to visit her then). she allus finds really neat kitty stuff for mom even though she can't use the innernets to shop, so we guesses there must really BE a world outside our virtual one . . . ;-D
17 November 2008
moki
we is certainly purrin' an' purrrayin' fur our furriend moki!what a brave kitty he is--matched only by the braveness of his mama.
they is a pair ordained by heaven.
PURRRRRRRR, PURRRRRRRR, PURRRRRRR, *soft rumbly grrrrrrrrrr*
11 November 2008
gone again
we is gonna be 10-10 an' onna side (which means--if you ain't old enough to member--in CB Radio parlance that we's gonna be layin' out, listenin' but not postin' much for a few days).
mom hasta go to chicago tomorrow mornin' acause her daddy's hafin' eye surgery fur his clawcoma (pressure's 40+ in each eye, should be 20 or less), an' to haf a catarak removed. we dunno why anybean would want anything "claw" or "cat" removed, but the doctor sez it's gotta get done so grampa kin maybe see a little again. he's 95 an' furry creaky, so we hopes you will all purr an' purrray fur him an' his surgeon & team. an' fur gramma, who's 91 an' don't take stuff like this furry well anymore. an' fur mom, so she can stay awake for the whole trip; that would be good. she's drivin' by herself acause daddy's doin' inventory an' boybean can't get loose of work.
daddy don't know nuffin' 'bout birthin' no blogposts, so unless we gets the chance to consult wif mom by cellphone an' she can find a public computer, we'll be quiet but wif efurry one of you in spirit. we'll be purrin' an' purrrayin' fur alla our furriends for whatefur their needs might be. we loves you all!!
mom hasta go to chicago tomorrow mornin' acause her daddy's hafin' eye surgery fur his clawcoma (pressure's 40+ in each eye, should be 20 or less), an' to haf a catarak removed. we dunno why anybean would want anything "claw" or "cat" removed, but the doctor sez it's gotta get done so grampa kin maybe see a little again. he's 95 an' furry creaky, so we hopes you will all purr an' purrray fur him an' his surgeon & team. an' fur gramma, who's 91 an' don't take stuff like this furry well anymore. an' fur mom, so she can stay awake for the whole trip; that would be good. she's drivin' by herself acause daddy's doin' inventory an' boybean can't get loose of work.
daddy don't know nuffin' 'bout birthin' no blogposts, so unless we gets the chance to consult wif mom by cellphone an' she can find a public computer, we'll be quiet but wif efurry one of you in spirit. we'll be purrin' an' purrrayin' fur alla our furriends for whatefur their needs might be. we loves you all!!
10 November 2008
cold weather makes strange bedfellows!
it turned mighty cold the day mom & dad finally deigned to remember that they had starving, unhappy kitties at home. (mom here: yeah, we were gone all of a day and a half!!!) we were furry, furry freezing!! so dad built a fire inna woodstove an' slowly we thawed out. but on sunday afternoon, when we were sposed to be pleasantly drowsy from that wunnerful heat, he let the fire die down--to "dip ashes", he said. it started to get chilly again! we fink he just wanted ta remind us that he's necessary. well, we showed him. MOM's the necessary one!!
the mystery of who got into the chair first back when we posted hell has frozen ofur is solved. ed was there furst; then xing climbed up an' sat on him. evidently he was comfy enough not to protest, an' she nefer even hissed at him. then nitro climbed up, an' she din't hiss at him, either. we don't fink she's "mellowing", she's just more secure when mom's there. that, an' she knows that mom'll pop her onna nose if she hisses when we ain't threatening;-)
here, cocoa is saying, "please, can't i get on yer lap, too?" poor woofie; she was furry traumatized while they were gone. she went to stay wif our bean brofur, but he don't live where he useta. he an' his kitty powder moved in wif his girlfriend leslie an' her two kitties (thomas an' karma), an' so it was a unfamiliar place an' had two strange kitties to deal wif. she hasn't even let daddy go potty by himself since they came home!!
ahhhhh! comfy at last!! daddy sure loves her to let her do this acause she squishes all kindsa important stuff when she wiggles around to get comfy!
the mystery of who got into the chair first back when we posted hell has frozen ofur is solved. ed was there furst; then xing climbed up an' sat on him. evidently he was comfy enough not to protest, an' she nefer even hissed at him. then nitro climbed up, an' she din't hiss at him, either. we don't fink she's "mellowing", she's just more secure when mom's there. that, an' she knows that mom'll pop her onna nose if she hisses when we ain't threatening;-)
here, cocoa is saying, "please, can't i get on yer lap, too?" poor woofie; she was furry traumatized while they were gone. she went to stay wif our bean brofur, but he don't live where he useta. he an' his kitty powder moved in wif his girlfriend leslie an' her two kitties (thomas an' karma), an' so it was a unfamiliar place an' had two strange kitties to deal wif. she hasn't even let daddy go potty by himself since they came home!!
ahhhhh! comfy at last!! daddy sure loves her to let her do this acause she squishes all kindsa important stuff when she wiggles around to get comfy!
08 November 2008
we's back!
hello, furriends. we pologizes for not hangin' wif you on peace globe day, but mom's day-hunting boss gave alla the hunters an' their significant ofurs a mini-vacation at a hotel inna town called eureka springs. when they left at noon on thursday, she shutted off the computer, so we couldn't visit wif any of youse. an' since they been back, she's hawgged the computer to put up the pictures she took. you kin see 'em here. it sounds like it was a pretty good place--furry friendly to furries! but it still burns our fuzzies that she din't leave the computer on!! an' they din't even bring us any of those t-shirts that say "mom & dad went on vacation, an' all i got was this lousy t-shirt". just wait. 4:00 a.m. is coming . . . .
06 November 2008
05 November 2008
01 November 2008
Una Ofrenda Virtual
. . . hecho para nuestro queridito nels. (a day of the dead virtual altar and offerings . . . made for our most beloved nelson.) mom finks that the mexican view of the dead returning is a much more healthy one than that of the judaeo-christian ethos with which she was raised (where usually it's a bad thing when the dead return!). you kin look here and here to find out more about this holiday if youse is unfamiliar wif it. she has decided to be happy and welcoming while remembering all those who have gone before us this year, instead of sad an' blue. we see them all, all the time, but we guesses this is a big thing for beans, who are not so "tuned in" to other frequencies.
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