yer better off wif a kitty . . .

instead of a .44 magnum!!

a splanation for billy

we noticed that when li'l billy sweetfeets gingersnap commented on "naughty, naughty mencats", he wanted to know if there was somefing wrong wif wantin' to eat all the foods.

well, yes, li'l furriend, in our case there is. our brofur nels is a geezer, an' that means he's furry old an' creakey in his bones, an' he has a prollem wif his heart. he hasta eat special foods that has extra vitymans an' stuff that geezers need to keep onna right side of dirt. they also makes him pee a lot, although we've nefur figgered out what peein' hasta do wif blood pumpin'! so if the foods you is steelin' borrowin' from a kitty has a differnt flavor from your foods, you should make sure that it's not something that is wrong fur you.

although his foods wouldn't hurt us unless we eated them alla time, mom sez we pees quite enough, thankyoufurrymuch, an' we doesn't need to increase our output. she also sez if you beats up on geezer cats or kitties who can't defend themselfs, you'll go to stay wif basement cat. furefurr.

an' besides, if you eat too much, you will asplode.

whitester wednesday

here's our cousin, powder, surveying the world from the safety of her daddy's shoulder. it may look like she's an "odd-eyed" white, but it's just that her lasers are set on two different speeds. she wanted to be ready to either stun or annihilate whatever was making noise on the carport!

ed wears boxing gloves

well, honestly, that's what it looks like in this picture!

naughty, naughty mencats

::music up:: "whatcha gonna do when they come for you, bad cats, bad cats? . . ."::music fade::

TODAY'S EPISODE: CHAIR JAIL

convicted losers, nitro (left) and edmund (right) agreed to make this PSA as part of a plea-bargain deal :

"kitties, when you try to strong-paw a geezer cat outta his food dish, this is what happens to you. you get sent to the chair jail. an' you get held there by a mean ol' matron wavin' a squirt gun. she don't smile, she don't gif you any treats. if you twitch a whisker, she shoots ya. she sez things like, 'we'll see how YOU like goin' wifout food, you bullies. whatcha think of THAT, eh? if suppertime comes an' some big bully browndog comes by an' pushes you an' growls at you, an' then eats yer food? eh? whattaya say? i can't HEAR you!!! . . .' an' stuff like that. It's no fun, especially if it's before she's had her coffee. so don't be a bully. geezers needs their foods, too. be good kitties, or you'll end up like us--in chair jail. we is furry sorry we was bad an' do not recommend the life of a bully. "

(overheard: is that camera still rollin'? off? good. jeez; i can't believe i said that [mimicking a baby girl-cat's voice: "we is furry sorry we was bad . . ."] gimmea break. let's go score some nip. i need to think about how to get his suppe . . . was that rain i just felt? it felt wet. awwww, crap!--she's got the squirter . . . !)

::music up and out:: "whatcha gonna do when they come for you, bad cats, bad cats? . . ."

don't think too hard, it's sunday!

while mom an' dad was passing the emergency pet hospital today (for a change, NOT hauling one of us in, thank bast!), they noticed the markee said, "is your pet right-pawed or left-pawed? ask a vet tech!" when they got home, mom started to check onna innernets, an' this is what she found:

The cat can also be a right pawed cat, a left pawed cat, or they can be ambidextrous. “Righty, Lefty or Both?” states that “Cats tend to have paw dominance somewhat akin to the right- and left- handedness found in humans. In one study, researchers reported right front paw usage was observed in 20 percent of the cats, while another 38.3 percent favored the left side. The remaining 40 percent were ambidextrous.”

so, lady- an' gentlecats, whattaya have to say about this? true? false? examples? anecdotes?

feh!

this is what our 'nip nanner looks like after the dambrowndog got hold of it. it doesn't matter that she din't chew it to pieces--we will NEFUR touch it again. woofie-spit---GAHHHHHHHHH!

doin' the fully monty

edmund has posted his full monty ofur on doing the q. he hopes you'll remember him when it gets votin' time!

feline friday

we got to discussing our purrsonalities the ofur day (all right, we were fighting), an' mom broke it up wif a promise to vestigate why we is like we is. here's some of what she found, wif some charts down towards the end of it. whaddaya fink? we all know the T.A.T. part is true!

a PSA for efurrybody

we all need as many "awwwwwwww" moments as we can manage. here's a contribution to your smile stockpile. and no comments saying, YUM or NOM need to be posted;-) we'll take that as a given from some of you.

oh, yay! we is awarded!!

our dear furriends, the st. louis meezers, has giftied us wif this award:we is furry proud to get it, an' will try to live up to it. we's sposed to pass it on to five more kitties, an' this is a portant decision, so we will mull it ofur an' make our awards a little later inna week, 'cause our thinkers is in "sunday" mode;-)

breakfast for 4, please

EXTREME FLOOFAGE!!!

ed's freshly-shampooed floofage. mom calls him her little flokati rug!!

not-quite-a-mancat-yet monday

on saturday, mom went to visit her furriend, auntie joni (who was the furst mom of our uncle-charlie-of-blessed-memory) an' got to meet our newest cousin: we gif you . . . (drum roll, please) . . .

CATO

he is a dimple-rumpy manx wif siamese markings. he has just a ittle bunny-fluff stuck on behind. it's really just the outside of a tail, wif no bone in it! an' his hinder legs are taller than his front ones, just like manxes should be. he sorta bunny-hops, too, but it sure don't slow him down--mom sez he's a li'l ball of fire when he plays!

you kin see inna top picture anna bottom one that he has some tigery-stripes comin' out on his legs an' face, so it'll be fun to see what he looks like all growed up. he's a pretty handsome feller already!
as he walked past mom's leg, he stopped an' hopped sideways in surprise when he furst noticed her tattoo! he sniffed at it an' patted it furry tentatively a couple of times before deciding it was nothing he wanted to play wif. (we will gif snaps to anycat who can identify the style of mom's design.) (an' no, cousin pam an' miss ginger, you can't play, acause you already know!)

cato is also furry s-m-a-r-t, an' auntie joni is prolly gonna haf a pretty lively time wif him in her life. an' here she thought she was gonna haf a nice, quiet retired life;-D

you kin see inna bottom picture that he has one of those ball-in-a-racetrack-ring toys--well, even though he really likes it an' loves to play wif it, that's not enuf fur him. he picks up his ofur toys (like the spiky jingle-ball we sent him) an' takes 'em ofur an' drops 'em inna racetrack, an' waits for THEM to go around, too. so far, he's been disappointed, an' we feel sorry fur the li'l feller--if he's smart enuf to figger out that it might be possible to make stuff to go, he oughta get his wish!!

if monty sez it's OK, we's gonna post his picture inna monty-q contest, even though he don't bloggify, just so you can all see how cute he is!!

REX, AVE ATQUE VALE!

THE HERO KING

HE LIVES FURREFUR IN OUR HEARTS.

check us OWT!

we is in the carnival of the cats this week!!!

how we spent our 4th of july

in durance vile, that's how!!! there was no flag-wavin', hot dogs, mom an' apple pie. was unamerican, we tells ya!! it was an apocatlypto!!

oh, ok, there was a flag wavin'. there was a mom, all right, but she had shampoo in her hand. there was a hot dawg, but she was dipped. apple pie? try pills!! an' for us innocent kitties, there was incarceration, plain an' simple.

it's all them darn fleazers' fault! they crowded in an' brought alla their relatives last week, so mom 'n' dad got some organic stuff to sprinkle onna carpets an' furnychur, an' to drop on our necks acause mom had been worryin' more an' more about chemicals an' kitties. but we turned into greasy, itchy messes, an' the fleas LOVED the organic stuff. they liked it so much, they sold it at their circuses for treats! we counted five circuses and 11 carnivals!!!

so today, the house got rug-sucked even in places there wasn't rugs, an' the slaughter of the fleazers began. we all got capstar pills, an' the fleazers drove us WILD in their haste to get offa us before they died; not many made it out alive.

xing (who has a really BAD flea allergy an' was all scabby) an' the geezer cat got baths wif a oatmeal soap in it. more fleazers perished. them two got packed into PTUs an' dumped onna carport.

then ed & nitro got dipped and stuffed in their PTU. still more fleazers became ex-fleazers.

cocoa got dipped, but SHE got to go run out inna field an' roll around. no PTU for her. unfair!!! she's a dawg, for bast's sake; she's a lesser being--an' she went free! where's that kitty constitution? there oughtta be somethin' in there about persecution!

then they put bombs inna house (but we din't hear no loud noises, an' it din't fall down), an' we languished in our PTUs onna carport for almost three hours! if we hadn'ta been soppin' wet [mom's note: we toweled 'em off, honest, we did!], we coulda took several naps in that time. but NOOOOOOOO. we hadda work, work, work to get ourselfs presentable again. an' after we FINALLY got back inna house, they made us STARVE a whole half hour before giffin' us our just desserts. an' main courses. an' by golly, there BETTER BE QUALITY TREATS later!

although it was kinda nice sittin' outside, chatterin' at the birdies up close, seein' the damdog make a bigger fool of herself by chasin' her ball, an' watchin' dad usin' a tennis racket an' a baseball bat to do battle wif a big ol' bee who din't wanna share carport space wif us. we could get useta that "outside" thing, if we din't hafta be locked in our PTUs. dad laughed at the notion of a stroller, an' we've tried the halter an' leash thing. maybe we can get them to get us a tent!anyway, that's the story of the inglorious fourth at our house. we hope none of you endured such a day, but had a safe, happy celebration wif yer famblies!

13 things that suck about rain

1. thunderboomers - an' we mean scary, house-rattlin', hide inna kitchen cabinet-type scary
   
2. bangers - little thunderboomers that don't scare, but disturb us enough to make us open an eye while nappin'
   
3. excessive wetness - damdog goes out to pee, comes back, an' shakes an' showers us
   
4. sunlessness - no warm spots to nap in
5. birdlessness - all hidin' from the rain in their dry nests
   
6. squirrellessness - ditto
7. crankyness - gloom makes mom an' dad peevish
   
8. chilliness - which goes wif #9:
9. humididitty - both of which make the beans run the A/C alla time, an' we freeze!!
10. sameness - borin', borin', borin' landscape fulla drips; it useta be fun watchin' 'em until we found out we couldn't catch 'em . . . an' wouldn't like 'em, if we DID catch 'em
11. muddiness - onna floor by the back door from beans & damdog goin' in-and-out, which is no fun to step in while peekin' out the door-window
    
12. slipperiness - onna floor where wet feets has been, lessening trackshun while playing T.H.O.E.
    
13. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz :nap time:
    

the ORIGINAL wordless--sphynx!

seldom-seen toezies

nelson lapurr's old toezies, kinda worn, but still serviceable!