we sails today

avast!
(an' our furst official act will be to keelhaul th'autopost function!)yarrrrrr, me hearties!!! heed me, all four-leggers, two-leggers, fliers, an' crawlers within th'sound o'me voice – whether ye be aboard our good ship the cat o'nine tails or ye be gathered on other vessels here in the mightiest piratecat flotilla ever: be welcome!!

i be yer ’umble cap’n, mao fang,

an’ these scallywags be yer crew:

nitro the nasty

xing the slice

an' igmu the irascible. note ye well that last year’s scrawny cabinkitt has done some growin’ an’ be now a full member o’the ship’s company. he be our lookout inna crow's nest, an' we be proud to say he been a-practicin'. his eyes be as sharp as his claws, an' the crewmembers attest to that!

oh, all right, we be kiddin'; here he be in his akshul post:

::doffs his headgear:: on a most sombre note, we regrets t'state that this has again been a sad summer 'mongst our comradely band, an' many of our furriends haff sailed off t’the rainbow bridge ahead of us. let us all hang our heds an’ droop our tails in their mem’ries for a moment, whilst we 'members them in their best days. ::sound of crickets and blowing wind::

::hat on:: we dedicates this day to them!

now, ye know well that piratin’ be an exhaustin’ manner o’earnin’ yer livin’, an' sorrow be terrible wearin' on the soul. in truth, i be cravin’ a bit o’time spent leisurely-like, an' so today the cat (an' us cats) shall sail to a beauteous island where we has no cares an’ no worries.

we has a true-drawn map an' a trusty crew. what say ye—will ye follow an' share in our revelry?

then let's away!!!! ::chains rattle, the sheets fill in a spanking breeze, and the fleet moves stately towards the open sea. voices are heard:

It's our time to go now,
: Haul away your anchor:
It's our sailing time.

Get some sail upon her
: Haul away your halyards :
It's our sailing time.

Get her on her course now
: Haul away your fore sheet :
It's our sailing time. 

below, ye'll find the finest o'amenities available to ye--

soft beds an' couches

tasty food fur cat, woofie, birdie, er bun,

an' libations both intoxicatin' an' mild--

hoist a flagon t'yer neighbor an' enjoy yersel's.

::time passes, the rigging creaks, the kitties feast, drink, chase up and down the masts, and nap a bit::

::igmu:: ahoy, cap'n!! the island be dead ahead!! ::cats rush helter-skelter to the rails; a few, who have never gained their sea legs, appear a bit greenish but game . . . ::

::the ships heave to (as do some greenish kitties), and boats make way to the warm, inviting beach::

ahhhh. stretch yer legs, me buckos an' buckettes. there be huts like unto those ahead scattered all ofur the isle. these be our homes fur th' day an' evenin'.choose which ye will, therein be all manner o' luxuries, includin' a welcome basket for each o'ye. by the bye, bear in mind that the comfort stations bear a passin' resemblance to yer hutso be sure there be no confusion in yer minds as to which be which, or we be losin' the clean-up deposit!

within thy huts again be more toothsome delicacies laid out for ye in the way o' food an' drink,

an' amusements aplenty awaitin':

there be an eating competition scheduled for th' noon meal, a six-legged race an' lectronic games for the kits, an' an under-the-door-limbo competition early this evenin'.

there also be pig racin', for yer wagerin' pleasure. we still be seekin' volunteer jockies.

the losin' mount will be guest of honor at the luau later! for the venturesome, we has a small fast boat ready fur those what may fancy a bit o'spray in their faces. (yes, there be cats what don't mind the wet, an' we hopes they takes the oppertunity to revel in it!) late this evenin' there will be illuminations an' bonfires, which ye may watch from the safety o'the ship or from yer hut, dependin' on yer degree o'distain fur loud noises.

then shall we be shephered by morpheus to our well-deserved rest, an serenaded by th'soft murmur o' th' tide. on the morrow, tarry yet a while if ye will--there be breakfast in bed for all who savor such! we thanks ye each an' all fur the sharin' o'th' day, an' hopes the memories will keep ye warm on such cold nights as come.

by th'Pow'rs, we o'th' cat o'nine tails bid ye all adieu, an' wish ye a fair wind an' a followin' sea where an' whenefur ye go.

ye be put on notice . . .

STAND WARNED!!

the good ship cat o'nine tails weighs anchor t'morrer at three bells o'the mornin' watch. an' fer those of ye what be bellyachin' about the ghastliness o'th'hour, come aboard this very night an' bunk wif us. we'll be tellin' ghostcat tales, chasin' ratties, an' snackin' on kippers!

scofflaw swan!!

toezie tuesday wif igmu

iggy's dainty toezies. we knows it's iggy acause ain't none of the rest of us haf black toezies. he seems to haf a thing fur high places--the kitchen crow's nest an' mom's linen closet inna baffroom are his favorite hangouts. we dunno where his aminal parents came frum, but there really are an awful lotta crows around that area!

guardian mancat!!

iggy has taken up the watch in the kitchen crow's nest! frum here, he can see the front door real good, an' he is furst to sound the alarm (the sound of his feet hittin' the counter as he flees an' high-tails it for parts unknown) when trooders come!

we remembers

WEIRD!!!! JUST WEIRD!!!

weird

 (adjective)

1. involving or suggesting the supernatural;
2. unearthly or uncanny: a weird sound; weird lights.
3. fantastic; bizarre: a weird getup.

whut's goin' on here????

these manbeans are stark staring cuckoo!!!

don't they even haff a clue among them?

sharing treats wiff vishus deers???

an' kisses???

what do you fink?

MO CATS DAY!!!

in solidarity wif our ozarks cuzzins, the ozark mountain cats,

we sellybrates

MISSOURI CATS DAY!!

we is proud to be frum an' liff in missouri--an' prouder still that the whole werld is sellybratin' what a wunnerful place this is fur cats! YAYYYYYY, MISSOURI!!!!!

*whut, mom?*

that "MO" does not mean "missouri"

*nahhhhhh, couldn't be--it's onna innernets, so it MUST be true*

whatever. you're cats, you do as you please anyway.

*yewbetcha! GO, MISSOURI!!*

the FAMBLY tree, that is!

our cousin, simon meezer, of arizona!! he is a mild-mannered meezer on weekdays and a paintbrush for hire on weekends! (biggify on his tail, if you don't believe us!)

toezie tuesday

our edmund, blissfully unaware that while his left toezies are merely objects of beauty and admiration, his RIGHT toezies are courting a couple of good, swif biffs to his head, courtesy of his crabby sisfur, xing.

Badges fur MLAP DAY!!!

Our wunnerful Miss Ann, of Zoolatry, has provided the beyond-pawesome badges fur you to display on yer bloggies in support of Meow Like A Pirate Day!! Please snag one (or bofe) an' fly them proudly in yer sidebar!!

THANK YOU, MISS ANN!!!!

YARRRRRRRRR!

AVAST, YE SWABS!

ye be put on notice that
sunday, 19th september,
in the year of our lord two thousand ten,
be the fourth annual
"Meow Like a Pirate" Day.

this day (MLAP) were instituted just after a time o' sadness an' woe in the cat blogosphere when we all needed to improve our spirits a bit by cuttin' loose an' haffin' oursels a wee bit o' holiday. it seems that once again, troubles an' sorrow has beset our little community an' we feels in need o' some jollity an' tuna joose!

ye can look back in the meowers' archive here, here (an' here, an' here--three parts!), an' here to get an idea of how we rolls . . . er, sails on such adventures. many fine kitties has joined the crew o'the cat o'nine tails, an' many more has sailed their own sleek vessels o'er the boundin' main in search o' treasure an' treats. we be a flotilla that commands respect an' temptayshuns at efurry port o'call!!

indeed, ye need no seafarin' experience to sail wif us--our doughty crew will lick ye into shape in a trice. if ye sails yer own vessel, ye need only rondyvoo wif us on the appointed day. if ye should answer a sirene call an' sail off t'seek yer own way, just remember t'be kind enuff to share yer ship's log wif us on yer bloggie!!

bring yer water-wings, yer mighty four-masters, yer kayaks, yer sloops, yer dinghies, an' yer pontoon boats on sunday, 19th september 2010 for the festivities. we invites ye all--cats, woofies, birds, buns, an' all such non-bean types--to sail wif us an' join the fleet for fortune, fame, an' fabulous adventures!!

meeeeeeYARRRRR!

WARNING!!!!

WARNING--NOT FOR KITTENS OR THE FAINT OF HART!!

THE TERROR MOUNTS!!!!

VISHUS STEALTH DEERS!!!

if you kittehs are out on patrol in the evening, don't be lulled into a false sense of security because all the pictures of vishus deers you've seen haf been in daylight! be smart, be wary, be jus' plum scairt!!

above is a picture taken at a TOP SECRET VD TRAINING CAMP where we see a nighttime camelflazh, er... cammaphl, er ... disguised vd galloping on its pointy, sharp hoofs after a stuffed decoy kitteh. look at its scary, blazing eyes, locked onto their targets!! he kin prolly see inna dark!!!! see its terrible teefs? they're so big, it can't even close its mouf all the way!! an' notice that the horrible stabbing prongs on its head are. not. visible!! this vd is operating in SUPER-STEALTH MODE!

this is quite a young vd, so they must be a newly-developed, genetically engineered breed--who knows what other drefful traits they are developing?? fangs? ahhhhhhh!! run away! run away!!

tabby tuesday - nitro's turn

tabbies is stripey cats!

some is more stripey than others!

bad boys, bad boys!!

this is where they end up!!

iggy's story: i was vulturin' on toppa mom's linen closet an' jumped down inta the sink an' knocked off all her eye meddysin drops anna dambrowndawg scarfed one up an' mom hadda get outta the shower to go smack her onna head to make her let go an' then go soak the bottle in alcohol to get the dawg germs offa it.

so you kitties out there, don't knock stuff offa the counters, or you could end up like me, on a rude pallet inna rustic jail, wif yer mom playin' judge-jury-an-jailer!! (an' i darn sure ain't tellin' her about scratchin' my gums on her toothbrush!! )

dis kitteh has been outdoors TOO LONG!!!

nope, sorry--you ain't goin'!

ed! (what?) you gotta get offa my purse! (nuh-uh.) yeah, you do--it's 7:45 already. (i'm comfy here.) ed, you could get comfy on a washboard! scramola, bud! (nope.) sonny, i'm gonna be late for work. if i'm late for work, the boss will get gripey. (so? it's not like YOU'RE not gripey. like right now. so you'll be a matched pair.) i'm gripey because you are a stubborn-stubborney, as granpa joe useta say. and if the boss gets gripey enough, he might fire me. (so? then you can stay home and i can use YOU for a mattress; you're softer than this purse, that's for sure.) ed, if i don't work, then there's no green papers. (and?) have you forgotten that green papers buy stinky goodness? and crunchies? and temptations? and . . . nip?

*scramble-scramble-scramble-thump!* [cat feathers fly everywhere]

ah; i thought you'd see it my way. [walks off, muttering: damn, i wish i didn't have to go to work today]

(mom? i can fix that, y'know.)

giddouddahere!!!

i helps My Mama be more beautyfuller

efurry once in a while, My Mama gets a craving fur earrings. most times, she makes 'em, acause she can get just what she wants that way.

but sometimes she buys 'em when it's too hard to make 'em, an' it's a hard decision, requiring much deliberation. she asked me for my opinion yesterday, acause since i am a ladycat, i haff good taste--which is different from tasting good, you know--an' because she wouldn't ask the boycats on a bet, because they don't haff good taste. OR taste good, i can promise you.

so i showed her the ones i liked bestest, an' she is gonna pick from among 'em. these are my most favorites, but she will hafta save green papers for a long time. an' we mussen't nefur tell My Daddy how many papers she sends to get them, or she sez there will be "ruckshuns"! i asked her if that was fibbin' (acause we ain't spos'd to fib) but she sez there's some things boys just don't need to know if us ladies are to preserve the shalom bais (peace inna household). i think it's all right not to tell him as long there is still enuf green papers to buy my stinky goodness!!

oh, woe.

we'll see you again, brave heart!

purrin' fur neala

revenge ain't so tasty when it's cold, an' you're the one who hasta eat it.

we is a little crabbilated. remember when we conned mom outta a second breakfast last weekend? well, daddy peached on us eventually, an' mom got her revenge yesterday morning.

daddy usually feeds us at 4:30 or 5:00 ayem inna morning, but he has gone to a three-day meeting in new hammmmmmshire an' mom din't get up until her regular time (6:45) to feed us!!! our tummies thought our throats had been cut!!

wordless wednesday

tummy-toezies-tail tuesday!!

our ed's got all the bases covered!

WE SCORES!!

*giggle* *snork* we scored bigtime yesterday! no, we ain't' playin' soccer/football. we's playin' clever buggers, which is a game we allus does well at.

daddy gotted up at 5:00 ayem inna mornin' to let the dbd outside for potty, an' he fed us.

mom got up at 5:20 ayem inna mornin' to go to the bean litterbox. daddy din't move when she got up, so she tippy-toed around so she woodn't wake him. of course, we ranned meowin' to her wif our saddest faces, an' sure enuf, when she came outta the little room, she fed us. ahahahahahaha! we din't tell her, an' don't you tell, neifur!!!

fanks, efurrycat!

well, we finks the memorial day campout at our house was a success. fanks to efurrycat who attended. we 'pologizes fur the lack of moles to chase; the word got out that there was gonna be a concatenation of cats an' they all moved to the next block. mom will be pleased! but the lively voles that whicky wuudler brought an' eric & flynn's farm-fresh meeses were excellent sport! we don't believe we missed any in the clean-up, but i'm sure mom will tell us if we did.

it was furry wunnerful to spend time around the cool air vent (as opposed to the stinky, smelly, hot campfire that mom & dad endured) wif furriends who haf the same interests an' likes an' dislikes! although summa the ghost-dog stories that got told by flashlight even scared US!!

mom got to go onna campout an' did pretty well, ex-toothwise. she sez, howefur, that she din't remember sleepin' inna tent an' paddlin' inna canoo to be quite so stren-you-us. (could be that the last time she did it was 'bout 10 years ago, an' in that time, yer mussels kin forget about a LOT of things! poor mom; she sez growin' old ain't fur sissies.)

fanks again, efurrycat!

owie! & wowie!

owie! our mom had a wisdom toof cut outta her mouf thursday mornin' (4 pieces!!!) an' she is not feelin' too spiffy. she has summa dr house's favorite candies to take, so she is nappin' a whole lot, an' only eats chocolate puddin', but she likes that.

she dunno if she will be able to go onna campout wif the ofur beans this weekend, an' is kinda crabilated about that; she was countin' onnit since they hasn't been campin' fur a coupla years. if she gets to go, then miss debby frum next door will come stay wif us an' make sure we has alla comforts o'home!!

wowie! but regardless if she's here or miss debby's here, there's a campout at our house startin' tomorrow night! bring yer fluffie blankies (it gets cool at night), tents, an' tunnels. we gots pillows, toys an' foods an' waters an' tuna joose (byob if you wants somethin' else--ackshully, byo "can" acause we can't haff glass containers onna National Scenic Riverways here in missouri). we aims to misbehave!!

HAPPY PURRRRTHDAY!

WE FANKS YOU EFURRSOMUCH FOR BEIN' OUR BESTEST, MOST FAVORITEST M.L., OUR HELPER, OUR FURRIEND, OUR GOODEST BLOGOSPHERE "AUNTIE".

THANKS FUR EFURRYTHING YOU DO!
HAFF A WUNNERFUL YEAR!!

wordless wednesday

what th' heck????

we can see that we will hafta watch the beans' motor vehicles a little more closely. . . . after comin' back from wallymart, mom went rushing straight to the bean litterbox room, an' rubbed an' scrubbed her right paw furry viggerusly wif lotsa soap. she was mutterin' an' scrollin' down the bad-werd list all along, sayin' stuff like, "blanketyblank birds, you'd think they didn't have anything to do all day but (bad werd). but (bad werd)-ing inna truck??? inna (bad werd) truck??? howinthe(bad werd) did they manage that? and how did it get there when the (bad werd) windows were closed? i SWEAR it wasn't there when we WENT to wallymart. (bad werd) birds. i just (bad werd) don't . . . ." you gets the drift.

when they had got all through shopping an' had put the bags o' swag inna back, they got into the cab, an' she saw some stuff onna dashboard, so she chipped at it wif her fingernail, scrubbed at it with her finger, then said, "y'know, that kinda looks like bird (bad werd). lookit that spot over there! and that one! and . . . auuugggggghhhhhh! i stuck my finger in bird (bad werd)!!! now i'll hafta boil it!!!" dad was laffin' an' laffin' an' told her she oughta hang her hand outsidea the window. she was furry unappreciative of his humor.

but it does leave us wonderin': how DID that birdie get in there to leave its callin' card? an' when? we're gonna sit inna window an' ponder this while we keep a lookout!

cozy new nap spot!

it's just my size. an' furry comfy, acause the "mattress" is almost as thick as the container is tall! ok, ok, it looks like a trash can, but it's really a laundry hamper. it's back inna utility room, an' no one bothers me there. besides, it's close to the dbd's water bucket an' the potty boxes, so it's pretty much ideal. you kin see that mom had brought more laundry to throw in the hamper, an' just dropped it onna floor acause she was so surprised to see it already occupied. i'm glad she didn't just grab an armload an' fling it inna washer-box!!

an' mom sez to tell all you norwegians (forest cats an' beans):
"Ha en god Syttende Mai!"

we's gonna camp out!!

we gots new campin' tents frum miss ginger!! we's gonna haf a sleepofur when mom & dad go campin' on memorial day!! teleport ofur, an' we'll haf the cubes an' the tunnel set up, too. an' you sissies who don't wanna camp wif us tough guys can visit xingxing; she'll haf a tea party all set up fur you.


ed fits in 'em, but he hasta kinda slide in slow an' creep out careful, or the thing gets caught on his booty an' follows him - much to his consternation! *giggle*

howefurr . . .

after ed got through appreciating the box, nitro & iggy got to cussin' an' discussin' who got the next crack at it. see who won:

an' here's the outcome:

the nipsticks? well, they ain't so shiny new any more--but still much appreciated. mom hadda chase these all down from three different rooms so she could document the degree of attention they've had!! so far, the dbd has not eaten any of them.

fun times!

ed thought furry highly of the bockus that mom's hansel-auction thingy came in. it smells enchantingly of kc, missy blue eyes, an' mama ml, as well as of primo nipsticks, which kc & her mama thoughtfully tucked inside as presents fur us! fank you so much!!!

below is a moovey of ed, appreciating the nipsticks, too!

Our cousin Roxy

roxy, naomi's kitteh, originally uploaded by olrebbie.

she lifs wif our mom's niece, naomi, in beautyful scottsdale, airyzona an' she is a pistol! after cousin naomi moved into her house, she kept thinking it was haunted becuz lights would be on in rooms where she had turned them off, and off in rooms where she had left them on. even inna middle of the night she'd wake up an' lights were on. finally, roxy jumped up an' whapped a light switch right in front of her, an' then she unnerstood--she wasn't cuckoo or haunted, just the companion of a furry clever kitteh!

simon meezer

simon meezer, originally uploaded by olrebbie.

he is our cousin, too, Roxy's big brofur.

manbean likes kitteh!!!

this german weatherman is a NICE man!!