05 July 2008

how we spent our 4th of july

in durance vile, that's how!!! there was no flag-wavin', hot dogs, mom an' apple pie. was unamerican, we tells ya!! it was an apocatlypto!!

oh, ok, there was a flag wavin'. there was a mom, all right, but she had shampoo in her hand. there was a hot dawg, but she was dipped. apple pie? try pills!! an' for us innocent kitties, there was incarceration, plain an' simple.

it's all them darn fleazers' fault! they crowded in an' brought alla their relatives last week, so mom 'n' dad got some organic stuff to sprinkle onna carpets an' furnychur, an' to drop on our necks acause mom had been worryin' more an' more about chemicals an' kitties. but we turned into greasy, itchy messes, an' the fleas LOVED the organic stuff. they liked it so much, they sold it at their circuses for treats! we counted five circuses and 11 carnivals!!!

so today, the house got rug-sucked even in places there wasn't rugs, an' the slaughter of the fleazers began. we all got capstar pills, an' the fleazers drove us WILD in their haste to get offa us before they died; not many made it out alive.

xing (who has a really BAD flea allergy an' was all scabby) an' the geezer cat got baths wif a oatmeal soap in it. more fleazers perished. them two got packed into PTUs an' dumped onna carport.

then ed & nitro got dipped and stuffed in their PTU. still more fleazers became ex-fleazers.

cocoa got dipped, but SHE got to go run out inna field an' roll around. no PTU for her. unfair!!! she's a dawg, for bast's sake; she's a lesser being--an' she went free! where's that kitty constitution? there oughtta be somethin' in there about persecution!

then they put bombs inna house (but we din't hear no loud noises, an' it din't fall down), an' we languished in our PTUs onna carport for almost three hours! if we hadn'ta been soppin' wet [mom's note: we toweled 'em off, honest, we did!], we coulda took several naps in that time. but NOOOOOOOO. we hadda work, work, work to get ourselfs presentable again. an' after we FINALLY got back inna house, they made us STARVE a whole half hour before giffin' us our just desserts. an' main courses. an' by golly, there BETTER BE QUALITY TREATS later!

although it was kinda nice sittin' outside, chatterin' at the birdies up close, seein' the damdog make a bigger fool of herself by chasin' her ball, an' watchin' dad usin' a tennis racket an' a baseball bat to do battle wif a big ol' bee who din't wanna share carport space wif us. we could get useta that "outside" thing, if we din't hafta be locked in our PTUs. dad laughed at the notion of a stroller, an' we've tried the halter an' leash thing. maybe we can get them to get us a tent!anyway, that's the story of the inglorious fourth at our house. we hope none of you endured such a day, but had a safe, happy celebration wif yer famblies!

03 July 2008

13 things that suck about rain

  1. thunderboomers - an' we mean scary, house-rattlin', hide inna kitchen cabinet-type scary
  2. bangers - little thunderboomers that don't scare, but disturb us enough to make us open an eye while nappin'
  3. excessive wetness - damdog goes out to pee, comes back, an' shakes an' showers us
  4. sunlessness - no warm spots to nap in
  5. birdlessness - all hidin' from the rain in their dry nests
  6. squirrellessness - ditto
  7. crankyness - gloom makes mom an' dad peevish
  8. chilliness - which goes wif #9:
  9. humididitty - both of which make the beans run the A/C alla time, an' we freeze!!
  10. sameness - borin', borin', borin' landscape fulla drips; it useta be fun watchin' 'em until we found out we couldn't catch 'em . . . an' wouldn't like 'em, if we DID catch 'em
  11. muddiness - onna floor by the back door from beans & damdog goin' in-and-out, which is no fun to step in while peekin' out the door-window
  12. slipperiness - onna floor where wet feets has been, lessening trackshun while playing T.H.O.E.
  13. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz :nap time:

01 July 2008

seldom-seen toezies

nelson lapurr's old toezies, kinda worn, but still serviceable!

30 June 2008

mancat monday

nitro, the squinty sphynx, originally uploaded by olrebbie.

some mencats are just no good wifout their morning coffee--just like some menbeans!! don't worry--he'll steal some from mom's cup as soon as her back is turned. cream . . . yum!!!!

29 June 2008

sunday, sweet sunday

we loves to help mom read the sunday paper. it's a cooperative effort--see? even xing an' ed aren't brawling! sundays are mellow.