12 December 2009

how does i call santy paws?

xing lu sez: my rotten brofur, that moo-moo! he just makes me SOOOOO mad!! i was snoozing away quietly onna sofa inna living room, an' he jumped up an' swatted me whappity-whap-whap on my delicate little pink (outlined in brown) nose. for NO REASON!! i had finely got my courage up to stay out inna living room wifout bein' on My Mama's lap (because there wasn't any room there on accounta her little flat computer), an' even nitro an' fat ed weren't bothering me. but moo-moo? HAH! i hissed a really mean hiss at him, an' he ran off to the kitchen.

shortly thereafter came a crash inna kitchen, and then some drefful language from My Daddy, an' here came moo-moo again, full steam ahead--MY head!! he ran right up the front of the sofa an' up ofur my head. i was so surprised, i couldn't even hiss--so he turned around an' came up and whappity-whapped me again. well, you may just imagine that i hissed him good THEN an' threw in a few loud growls for emphasis.

My Mama threw her shoe to make him go away, an' it scairt him, so HE hissed, an' then I hissed louder, an' pretty soon nitro an' ed were hissin' too. so My Mama hollered, "if i'd wanted a dam snake pit, i'da got snakes insteada cats!! you kin all just quit that racket an' take a time out!!!!" then i hadda go to my room (which doesn't haf a warm stove, but there are two warm blanket-y beds), an' moo-moo hadda sit inna computer room, an' ed an' nitro just skulked back behint the sofa an' stayed outta Her way.

we can't even haf a catsmas tree acause moo-moo finks he's a acro-cat an' My Mama's afurraid he'll swing onna branches an' pull it ofur. i think santy paws should know that my brofur is a furry, furry bad little kitty an' shouldn't get nuthin' fur catsmas. My Daddy even calls him "billy bad@$$"!!

But My Mama sez that santy paws knows efurrything about efurrycat anyways, an' i don't need to be a tattletail. i don't know what that is. i just has a reglar floofy tail. it doesn't make no tattle; at least i've nefur heard or seen any. so i will hope an' purr that's true.

08 December 2009

neckwarmer, part II

yesterday, summa you kitties wondered if dad's big giant head (why's mom chucklin' at that?) din't put a big dent in my belly. akshully not; here's the ofur picture she was gonna post, but couldn't get it to upload fur some reason. she's at home today, sickly, but not so sickly that she couldn't try again--an' here it is. you kin see that even when he tipped his head backerds, there was still plenty of room for it an' he just kinda ended up nestlin' in my furchin. so it was ok.

06 December 2009

happy saint nicholas day!

catsmas decoratin'* starts offishully at chez pierce when mom brings this li'l feller outta the attic an' puts him inna tall lighted cabinet inna liffin' room.
it's allus the same day: Saint Nicholas Day, december 6th.
our croatian great gramma bean giffed him to mom when she was only 7 years old (mom, not great gramma), so he's more'n half a century ancient. he is made of paper marshay an' his outfit is flocked on. he's holdin' a li'l sprig of somethin' that's sposd to be a catsmas tree, an' his top half twists offa his bottom--he was filled wif chocolate candies when he was new. yew kin learn more about the good saint here an' here.

mom allus did saint nicholas day treats fur our boy bean, dash, as he grew up, so he knew something most kids inna ozarks din't. when he was half-growed an' studied german language in school, one winter morning the teacher (herr zahn -- mr tooth) told the kids (in german) that whoefur took off their shoos an' put 'em outsidea the door would get a surprise. alla the kids looked at dash like he was goofy while he did it, because some of them understood the instructions but they din't think they made any sense, so they din't do it. but he did it acause he knew that that's what kids in europe would do the night befur saint nicholas's day. then the next morning they would find the little treats that the saint had left fur them. so out inna hall was an older student wif a bag of candy--an' since dash was the only one to show up, he got the whole thing!! mom was furry proud for him!

so this is allus a happy day at our house, an' we wishes one to YOU, too!
*ixept outdoor lights, which can go up as early as mid-november, acause dad puts them up an' he sez all sortsa non-catsmas-like words if he hasta do it when it's rainin' or snowin' or icin'.