furrsday furrteen

things our mom does to drive us crazy:

1. sheds her long, curly head furs all ofurr our soft, catfur-padded resting places. it tangles our lovely short fluff into wads that roll efurrywhere, an' then she yells at US for shedding when she sees 'em.
   
2. makes "fffft fffft fffft" sounds to scare us into thinking the squirt bottle is nearby (an' it works--that's the embarrassing part).
   
3. holds our heads in wrasslin' grips an' picks eye-boogers outta our eyes. if we wanted 'em gone, we'd wipe 'em ourselfs. we has paws, after all.
   
4. feeds the woofies first, when it's obviously US who are just skin and bones.
5. laughs at us when we make fox paws when we jumps--at least she thinks they are fox paws. we MEANT to do that.
6. won't share even the least little bit of her peanut butter sammich at her breakfast time during the workdays, although we are pitifully thin and weak, since it's been two naps since dad fed us.
   
7. remembers efurry little thing we do wrong ("dammit, cat, is yer face in those cheetos again? git outta there!"), and nefurr even mentions all the times we could have eaten the cheetos but didn't. mostly because they keep them in the cupboard, but still . . .
8. makes us share her lap. absolutely unacceptable. I'M the king of the lap *no, I AM* *whatyoutalkingabout? I AM!* *you boys are just silly. efurrybody knows I am the QUEEN of laps!* (. . . long, noisy, acrimonious discussion ensues . . . issue is tabled due to heavy schpritzing by mom.)
   
9. says that every man jack of us is going to the pound if she finds one more unauthorized pee spot. well, she won't authorize any of the ones we want! what are we supposed to do in the face of uncooperativeness like that? right; so we do it.
   
10. turns a blind eye and a deaf ear to our pleas for snacks when she's home at lunchtime. that leaves one eye that sees and one ear that hears, and she STILL doesn't unnerstand, an' won't make wif the treats!
11. goes back to sleep on weekends after getting up to feed us so dad can get a little extra sleep--doesn't she realize that there are post-prandial obligations, like petting and skritching and refilling of water bowls and dangling of toys? dad has not taught her furry well.
    
12. keeps on nipping our claws off just when they get to that perfect razor-sharpness. so what if they snag her clothes? we could be shredding her skin with them, but no; she doesn't think of that.
    
13. thinks that newspapers are something she should be "reading", when they are clearly meant for lolling on by cats. sometimes she even spreads them ofurr us! we puts the bitey on 'em until she gets the message!
    

wordless wednesday

does anycat want some fur extensions?

we gots enough fluff here (not the greyish-green stuff--that's just plain ol' grass . . .) from xena's last brushing to make a sphynx into a persian!! we've included mom's size 7 1/2 shoe for some perspective.

sometimes you feel like a rub . . .

sometimes you don't!*MOOOOOOOOMMMMMM! QWEEEE-YUT!!!*

the vultures are circling . . .

it's TREAT time!!

(almost) wordless wednesday

for those of you who wondered . . . it is a trash can, but it isn't trash. it's the woofies' food; the beans buy 50# bags, slit them open, an' put bag an' all in the can. the lid was sposed to inhibit sampling, but nitro figgered out on the second day how to pop the lid, so it usually has one of those stretchy cords with hooks holding it down.

tabbie toesie (an' a glimpse of tummy) tuesday!

here's our efurr-furry, cranky sisfur, gettin' some quality time on mom's lap.

gramma useta complain about her fuzzy cat's long toe furs, an' could nefurr unnderstand why the poor kitty fought her so hard and drew so much blood while she trimmed 'em. after all, that lectric razor was bran' new an' surely wasn't pullin' the hairs out!

uhhhhh, gramma? noise? you fink maybe it was a little scary for the kitty, haffin' that loud buzzin' thing nibblin' at her toezies while you held her down?

beans. sweartabast.

life is good

here i am, meditating on the joys of being a beloved kitty. i gets lotsa chin an' throat skritches. i gets fresh water an' food i don't hafta chase or share twice a day. it nefurr rains on me. nothing chases me or tries to hurt me (except the boycats, and they don't mean it). My Mommy brushes me, an' it feels good, an' i look more prettier. i'm nefurr too cold an' usually not too hot. i has my own bed an' my own litterbox, if i asks for them. My Mommy kisses me onna nose an' tells me i'm the furry best xingy inna whole world--that really makes me feel special! i gets treats efurry day, an' i don't even hafta ask for 'em--they just hand 'em out!! once i gots little dried fishes from pretty luna in spain--an' My Mommy has saved 'em inna frijamerator just for me. once in a while, i gets to eat one in my own room, so the boycats can't steal it; it is LICIOUS, an' i purrs nicely when she gives it to me to thank her. she sez she loves me acause i am soft an' pretty an' purry. an' that's furry good. life is good. i'm glad. --xingxing

ride 'em, cowcat!!

mom was bended ofurr to take a close-up of nitro. ed just sauntered ofurr from the counter where he was nappin' an' climbed aboard to settle in for hairs- an' ear-nuzzling! she made him disembark after snapping this picture. by the time she was through, nitro had moved on . . . an' she hadda go find her back brace.

harmony restored

ok, so mom's made up wif cocoa. mom told us that she knew, efen as it happened, that cocoa was just being a dawg, but it hurt her so drefful to see a little life end that her brain just went off-planet for a minute.

she splained that the ofurr labadores that have lived wif us have been chasers who wouldn't know what to do wif a critter if they caught it. one time, thor-of-blessed-memory treed a squirrel onna carport post an' he coulda easily stood up a bit an' grabbed it, but he just wanted to see it up close. so it jumped down on his head an' ran all the way down his back an' jumped from his butt into the bushes. he was so startled that he nefurr even moved! so cocoa's behavior was a real shock. we's seen her chase before, but she's nefurr caught anyfing an' mom nefurr dreamed she would.

well, we asked her: ferbastsake, mom--think about a semitruck meetin' a bicycle. who's gonna win, even if the truck doesn't mean any harm? she hadda agree.

so all's well between them. mom is speakin' to her again, an' played wif her out in the yard for a long while. here she is, wantin' to go back out--but dad's mowing an' she hasta stay in now. she's not at all afurraid of the mower machine, an' she trots along right beside him an' it--he's worried she'd get hit by something flying outta the bottom of it.

stoopid cocoa!

mom's cryin', an' it's all cocoa's fault. when mom got home for lunch, she let her out to go pee, an' cocoa ran an' grabbed a robin an' kilt it even though mom was yellin' at her to stop before she even got to the birdie. broke its neck. it had just caught a big ol' worm, an' it wasn't even halfway swallowed yet. mom lost her cool and whacked cocoa onna head wif her shoe to make her let go of the birdie. when she picked it up to go bury it, she saw that it had a white coating ofur one eye, so it nefurr even saw the damdog coming. we hopes it wasn't one of the little fev-vers we watched grow up onna carport this year. that would be too sad. we're furry glad we don't go outside an' do bad things, 'cause gettin' whacked onna head wif a shoe would prolly kill us!

mom's still cryin', an' cocoa's got a time out inna bafroom, 'cause mom don't wanna lay eyes on her. she's gonna be there a long, long, long time. mom's goin' back to work an' won't be home until after six. if cocoa's lucky, dad'll get home before that.

damdog, makin' our mom cry. she really suffers when little things get hurt or die, an' seein' it happen has just borked her brain. are your beans this goofy? it's not like it was one of us or anything. guess she just loves all li'l critters, even ones she doesn't know.

widebody wednesday

need we say more?

YAY!!! dad's better

poor ol' dad is no longer green-faced. the pee-problem doctor told him the rock was only 1 anna haff centymeters, too little to worry about needin' a noperation, so that's good. what's bad is that until the rock comes out by itself, he's gonna have these hurtin' spells. so if it hurts again, he has medysin he can take for the hurty. or maybe it's gone already. nobean knows. at least he knows what it is now an' isn't afurraid somethin' permanently gnarly is happenin' to his innards.

one of the beans who comes in to dad's store says he had a rock like that, too. only his was 11 anna haff centymeters big. dad thinks his hurts like pushin' a tater through a straw, but that ofurr poor bean was tryin' to push a nellyfunt!

thanks to all of you who worried and purred wif us!!

an' now, on with the show:we was good brofurs tonight: we helped nelson while he ate supper. we watched his chows so they din't run away while he was getting a drink of water! why does mom holler on us when we do this?? she says we makes him nervous. what's to be nervous about? it's not like it's bean food or anything else good, like hammm. we wouldn't put the bitey on his chows. nefurr. not us.

green faced dad

yesterday afternoon dad turned kinda green in the face an' whimpered a lot, so after supper mom took him away in the big red truck to the bean ER. they din't come home until after the middle of the night. there was a furry smart CAT at the ER who looked him ovurr furry closely inside an' out, an' then told the ofurr bean vets that he has a rock in his kid me. now he hasta go see anofurr bean vet who specializes in pee problems to get it out. we are furry proud to know that one of our kind was so smart and contributed to his care. we will continue home care, if he lets us. although so far, he has refused alla fishie flakes we has offered him.

since today is sunday an' alla bean vets are out golfin', he's takin' some medysin that makes him smile a lot. we thought that meant we could go cuddle on his lap but he keeps shovin' us off. that's ok; we'll wait until he naps (which he's doin' a lot of, too), an' make ourselves at home!

since there are more bean vets and probly an operation in his future, mom sez she may not be home to turn on the puter much for a couple of days. we just won't know until the pee problem doctor tells him what's happenin'. they told us not to fret, that dad'll be fine, but routines might be upset for a day or two. we hopes this doesn't mean we're gonna get fed late.

we would certainly like to know how he got that rock in there in the first place. so would he; he swears he would nefurr do it again, if he knew!

fev-ver friday

lookit the li'l fev-ver who was peepin' an' chirpin' outside our back door!! he was hollerin' for his mama to come feed him, an' she was alla way ofurr here inna yard!he din't act like he wanted to play wif us, although we 'vited him through the window wif great big smiles, so he flew up onna shed roof, an' mama joined him there.

edmund's meme

skeezix tagged me for a meme! i'm SO proud!

What were you doing 10 years ago?
i wasn't here yet.

What were you doing a year ago?
sleeping

What are your five favorite snacks?
temptations, fishie flakes, cream, real live dead shrimp, and ice cream

Five songs you know all the words to:
i'm not furry musical. all i can 'member is "i'm a little peecat" that mom sang to each of us when we was little:

i'm a little peecat, short and stout.
my tail is my handle, my mouf is my spout.
when i get a hairball
then look out--
i'll hack an' cough an' urk it out!

Five things you would do if you had a million dollars:

make homes for alla homeless kitties an ofur critters
make free critter hospitals for all critters
take miss midnight on a world tour
buy a nip ranch
buy anofurr nip ranch

Five bad habits:

poopin' outside the box
hauntin' xing while she's eatin'
hauntin' nels while he's eatin'
gettin' cranky while i do nip
puttin' the bitey on mom's chin when she's not expectin' it

Five likes:

miss midnight
warm laundry
doin' nip
nappin' on mom's frontal appendages
whippin' up on nitro

Five things i'll nefur wear again:
efurrything but my own lovely fluffy furrs

Five favorite toys:

the nip bananna
bugs
pink fev-ver boa
mom's hairs
anyfing that crinkle-crackles

I tag:
oh, gosh, i dunno who's already been tagged! ok, i tags:

1. miss midnight, my sweet kittygirl
   
2. finnie, of the carolina cats
3. toby, if he'll come outta retirement
4. flynn, of eric 'n' flynn
   
5. miss patches, of the big piney woods cats
   

widebodied wednesday

sir edmund the extremely floofy, and an innocent bystander, nels. nels looks quite large next to edmund due to the foreshortened view of ol' swagbelly. trust me, there's no comparison--nels weighs 9.8 lbs, ed comes in at 23! >;-) nitro)

tummy tuesday - getzger

this is miss ginger's "watch cat", getzger. he is a blue abbysinian kitty, an' he keeps himself busy alla time. he is just flat nosey an' into efurrything. he patrols the house constantly, just like skeezy, 'cause he's their safety officer. it just drives his mama nutz, but they are safe from intrusions of all kinds, except for the ones getzger causes! ;-)

mancat monday

we told nitro he was gonna take center stage on mancat monday, but DIN'T tell him we were gonna post the candid of him slickerin' himself up for the photo shoot. WOW! is he M-A-D!!! *giggle* xing & ed *smirk*

Mancat Monday!!

well, heck! we had a fine post lined up, and DPB saved the picture to the same server that the vanished picture of mom's nose-holes is on. so you can't see THIS one, either. so we started to make a whole new post, an' DPB won't let us upload anyfing. we are peevish. we'll try later.