FREAK-OUT FRIDAY!!!

mom & dad wented out to look for a new machine to replace mom's ancient green one, an' THIS is what they discovered in the front yard of an ofurwise purrfectly normal-looking home:

***THE MISSOURI HEADQUARTERS
OF THE VISHUS DEERS!!!!***

they haf the absolute crust to brag about themselfs by advertisin' the location this flagrantly! we din't see no beans around, so we dunno if they is bein' held hostage an' stockholm'd, or if they is willing participants . . . or if they has been *shudder* eaten!! we can't quite figger out what role the swans play, eifur. dessert? fev-ver factories for kitty-lures?

there is something more than usually upsettin' about the big deer onna right, but we can't quite put our paw on it . . .

if you wanna know the location so you can avoid teleporting around it on the way to our house, we can email it to you.

PLEASE, PLEASE be extraordinarily aware--they are organizing!!!

our NOMSS furriend!

it was lannie's barkday last sunday--we wishes you a shiny happy barkday, lanfear! may you an' your beans live long an' prosper;-)

toesie tuesday!

manly mancat monday

if YOU don't talk to your kitty about 'nip, who will?
(how about those mancatly whisker humps, gals??)

huh? earthquake?

we din't feel nuthin'. we was sleepin' the sleep of the just!! (just kitties, that is.) mom & dad were in lala-land, too.

the zen of grooming

breathe deeply; recline; relax;

stick tongue out and catch a hank of fur;

disengage that brain!

move head upwards in long, sweeping motion;

lose yourself in the moment.

think of nothingness.

repeat many, many, many times.


meditate while ingesting furs;

what is the sound of one cat hurling?

watchful wednesday

we don't think nitro would wanna be a woofie, but if he were,
he would definitely be a watch-woofie!

thank you thursday

this thankful thursday, we wants ta thank alla you who, wif your sweet words, heartfelt purrrayers, kind thoughts, an' loving purrs, comforted us earlier this week when xena left us. we is still awful sad, but the warmth of your reaching out to us has helped more than we can say. you is the one, the only kitty blogosphere, an' we wouldn't wanna be wifout you! whiskery kisses an' warm snuggles to you, each an' efurry one!!

nels, ed, nitro, an' xingxing . . . an' cocoa, mom, & dad

widebody wednesday

it looks like ed's been modeling an' not tellin' us!

mom found this on her calendar at work!!

tearful tuesday

our sweet, quiet, woofie sisfur, miss xena velvet-ears, went to the bridge yesterday.

she was nefur mean to any of us, nefur chased or barked at us. she liked it when we'd sleek up against her, an' would gif us little licks. she just watched an' lissened to efurrything, an' nefur need anyone to tell her when it was treat time--she just showed up an' waited quietly at dad's chair. she was our favorite woofie.

her kid-mes had been failing for a while, an' she hadn't been eatin' or drinkin' or nuthin'- not even waggin' her tail - inna last week. so mom an' dad splained that even though she had had a wonderful, active, happy life wif us, now she was goin' to her true, best home to be wif her doggie-daddy thor an' momma sugarbritches, an' all her little brofurs an' sisfurs who left when they was little. an' maybe a surprise appearance by some ofur brofurs an' sisfurs who growed up, like her; we dunno. but we know that her hips an' back don't hurt no more, an' there'll be steaks, cool water, an' treats efurry day, an' she will chase her daddy around again, nippin' at his big ol' floppy flews. an' he won't mind at all, this time.

mom sez this sadness is pain we take on ourselfs gladly because it means xena is now wifout pain, an' so we bear it on that account, but oh! we miss her drefful already.

A Bridge Called Love
It takes us back to brighter years,
to happier sunlit days
and to precious moments
that will be with us always.
And these fond recollections
are treasured in the heart
to bring us always close to those
from whom we had to part.
There is a bridge of memories
from earth to Heaven above...
It keeps our dear ones near us
It's the bridge that we call love.
--Author Unknown
*MYOOF* *MYOOF* *MYOOF* *MYOOF* *WOOF*

nels, ed, nitro, xing, cocoa
mom, dad, dash, leslie

mancat monday

nitro discovers the outdoors!!look! outdoors lazer eyes!! how did he DO that????

watchin' cars!

watchin' birdies!!

watchin' woofies!!

thankful thursday for last friday!

ed sez:

las' friday, mom an' me had a wing-ding-doo of a purrthday party wif lotsa people. (nitro an' nels hid a lot, but that just meant more pettin's for me an' xing, who is a love sponge an' will throw herself onto anyone who makes a lap.) the whole thing was a surprise for mom, an' she was just gob-smacked by the party. us kitties knew, of course, acause we hadda help snoopervise the preparations. daddy had been workin' on puttin' this togefur for almost six months--it was furry hard to keep our little fuzzy yaps closed!

lotsa beans sent cards, an' both grammas an' auntie marilyn an' auntie ethel had called wif purrthday wishes an' had sented green papers for a "spa day"--mom was excited about that. she splained that she can go get petted good, an' haff her paws rubbed real special, an' the claws painted, but that it costs papers to get that done if yer a bean. glad i'm a kitty!

she was sad all friday that she hadn't gotten a card or a call from her heart's sister, joy, in omaha NE. inna afternoon, dad came into mom's work an' told her to cover her eyes for a birthday surprise. she did, an' then dad said, i'm bringing it in now--it has long, blonde fur and wiggles its tail--mom whipped her hands off her eyes acause she knew perfekly good an' well that daddy wouldn'ta got her a puppy--an' there stood joy, wagglin' her hindquarters an' laughin'. daddy had got her here, an' she stayed until noon on sunday. it was super-great for all us kitties, acause auntie joy LOVES critters an' cats especially, so we got lotsa the best skritchin's an' rubbin's an' cuddlin's efur! we has a picture of auntie joy, but she will snatch us all bald-headed (mom included) if we posts it, so we won't.

daddy had took off from work early, cleaned the house, an' smoked some pork an' some chick-hen, an' we all got some. we din't like the cole slaw an' tater salad, though. an' miss ginger, mom's bestest furriend in town, came an' brought a chocolate cake decorated wif palm trees an' an ocean acause she knew how much mom an' dad liked cancun! an' her daughter lanie sent a pretty handmade purrthday card--i put the bitey on it as a seal of approval later on.

on saturday, mom an' auntie joy went out oglin' shiny beads an' stuff, an' inna late afternoon some out-of-town furriends stopped by, so dad smoked some more pork, chick-hen an' a whole half a sammon. yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. we were all burping. we each an' efurry one just snatched that fish outta the fingers offering it, an' we nefur do that--foods hasta be deposited onna table or plate or floor for us to take it. not sammon--that's a whole 'nuther subject! we got leffofurs on monday at lunch, too--but mom don't let "locks" sit around furry long. we dunno why she calls sammon that; it doesn't look at all like a door fastener.so it was a successful purrthday for both of us--it's a good thing we like the same stuff since we shares a purrthday. an' daddy succeeded in rendering mom speechless, which he can't do furry often, so it really was a special day we won't furrget!

wordless ed loves his mommy

happy purrthday, ed!! (an' mom)

happy 7th (8th?) purrthday, ed!! mom sez you gets stinky goodness all your own tonight!!

(an' happy birfday, mom! she is 60 squillion naps old today!)

MY middle name is

the handsome dragonheart an' his big "little" brofur, merlin, has graciously tagged me for the middle name meme. thank you, you nice, polite boykitties! (unlike certain brofurs who shall remain nameless an' who wouldn't think to include me in anything . . .)

1. You have to post the rules before you give your answers.
2. You must list one fact about yourself beginning with each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use your maiden name or your mother's maiden name).
3. At the end of your blog post, you need to tag one person (or blogger of another species) for each letter of your middle name. (Be sure to leave them a comment telling them they've been tagged.)

the name My Mommy gave me is xing lu, which she sez she was told means "fortunate jade", so that means my middle name is furry short:

L is for lovey; i just loves to love on My Mommy and My Daddy an' my woofie sisfurs. i sleeks up against them an' lets them all love on me.

U is for unassuming; My Mommy sez that means i don't ask for much, an' i don't, except for the right to sit on her lap or frontal appendages whenefur i can. oh, an' i do ask for treats before bedime, but that's only 'cause the woofies are gettin' some. ummmm, an' i asks for crunchy foods inna morning an' when Mommy and Daddy come home from hunting. an' maybe once in a while, i ask to sit inna living room window when nitro is in it (an' sometimes he even lets me, but we has to cuss an' discuss it for a long time, an' that makes My Daddy nervous, 'cause he sits inna chair right in front of that window). an' i really like to lick ice cream spoons, but don't get pushy about it unless some ofur cat thinks he's gonna get some first. an' once in a while i might hint a little that some fresh water would be welcome. an' occasionally i might mention that i would like to retire to my suite of rooms because the boycats has been devillin' me pretty much. but ofur than that, i don't ask for much. really. oh, yes, an' i remember once i asked for catnip from the catnip fairy. or maybe twice. but not more than that. probably.

an' now i tags that handsome young mancat, buddah, to tell us 'bout himself via his middle name. thank you all for reading!

middle name meme

we boys have been tagged for the "middle name" meme, so here are the rules:

1. You have to post the rules before you give your answers.
2. You must list one fact about yourself beginning with each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use your maiden name or your mother's maiden name).
3. At the end of your blog post, you need to tag one person (or blogger of another species) for each letter of your middle name. (Be sure to leave them a comment telling them they've been tagged.) (we meowers skated around this a little, 'cause enough kitties to spell "percival" wouldn'ta left many for ofurs to tag;-D)

nels (tagged by karl of the cat realm) gets to go first:

my name is nelson john lapurr:
J is for jumping - even though i'm 18 years old, since mom's been squirtin' dr frank's joint pain relief for pets in my mouth, i'm jumping up on the chairs again without help. she can even touch my hindquarters without me cussin' now. no, she doesn't work for dr frank. it just works good on me, an' i'm proud for other kitties to know it!
O is for old kitty
H is for hearthcat (if only we had one--mostly i just toasts myself by the wood stove)
N is for not too old to smack wayward cat brothers
whew! that was hard!! thanks for exercising my brain to match my legs!
****i tag monty q cat****

ed and nitro got tagged by alexi an' annie of krasota castle cats:

i'm (sir) edmund percival hillary--here's mine:
P is for plump and proud!
E is for edwardian in my manners when i have too much fatcat ale
R is for rotund
C is for curvaceous
I is for incredibly magnificent
V is for victorious (in my slam matches wif nitro!)
A is for adipose
L is for loving - my beautyful miss midnight!
****I tags my darling middie for this meme!****

nitro: i doesn't have a real middle name, just the initial, like mr president harry s truman. i dunno what HIS stood for, if anything,
but mine is for STUBBORN!!!!
****i tagged derby the sassy cat for this meme, but he'd already done it. so please, miss mittens polypaws of the big piney woods kitties, would you play along?****

thanks, all youse guys for includin' us--but could someone please tag whiny little xingxing? she's pouting acause nocat tagged her . . . an' she's hissy enough to begin wif!

we's not drownded

thanks to alla youse who has emailed an' commented, wondering if we was in the flooded area. yup, we is, but nope, it hasn't got us! our whiskers are dry, though both mom an' dad both hadda change their routes to their day-hunting jobs a little because streets an' even whole innersections in town were flooded. our house is up on toppa a little hill, so we doesn't get the really bad wetness. the only thing is that the back an' front yards turn into mud an' the woofies track it inside, an' we learn more words for our "don't say" list.

an' speakin' of woofies, here's the nice police people rescuin' a woofie who had got stranded wif his mom (she's in the purple coat, left upper corner) when she tried to drive through water over the road. that is a VERY SILLY AND DANGEROUS THING TO DO!! she is lucky the only thing that happened is that they got stalled. they coulda got swept away an' drownded, like happens efurry year in the ozarks. beans forget this little almost-rhyme: DON'T DROWN, TURN AROUND!! even a very few inches of water running across the road can push sideways hard enough to make cars go swimming.
mom has had the very icky stay-at-home-and-hope-you-sleep-all-day flu last week, compounded by bronchitis ("coughing up christmas colors", as her doctor puts it), and now has an ear infection that has already maked a hole in her left ear drum so she can't hear. we offered super glue, but she sez it'll grow back on its own; this has advantages for us, though. we can get into stuff on her left side an' she can't tell we're doin' anything!!

last week she felt miserable enough that she din't even care if we ate!!! all we could do was cuddle her, an' she never even hollered when we did the boob-step or bladder-step. but now she has gone back to day-hunting, and is feeling well enough to be REALLY disgusted by being still sick, and can squall loudly when trodden on in the wrong place. we continue to minister through warmth every evening, an' help her when she can't finish her yogurt. *giggle*

We the Felines . . .

THE WORLD CATSTITUTION

Whereas: All cats (an' their squillion cousins) are created equal to one another and superior to other life forms, and all other, lesser species must learn to deal with those facts,

and

Whereas: All rights and benefits which accrue to cats do also accrue unto squillions,

Therefore:

We the Felines (an' Squillions) of the World, in order to form a more beneficial union with lesser species, establish justice, insure our domestic tranquility, provide for our common defense, promote our general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty and a quality lifestyle to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Catstitution.

I. All cats have the right to be worshipped as they please.

II. No gov or mint shall infringe upon kitties’ freedom to screech.

III. All cats have the right to keep and bear/bare claws, and this right must not be infringed upon with claw-trimmers of any sort.

IV. No new kitties may be quartered, temporarily or permanently, in cat-occupied domains without specific prior permission from the cat occupants.

V. All cats have the right to not be unreasonably squished into PTUs and transported to beans of the veterinary persuasion, nor have their catly persons violated with cold thermometers and stabby needles, without probable cause, i.e., incontrovertible evidence that illness is present and/or a request from the cat in question.

VI. All cats have the inalienable right to walk on any surface, sleep anywhere, and groom themselves anywhere they please.

VII. All cats are perfect, just as they are, no other life form shall have the right to pass judgment as to height, weight, and ratios thereof upon them.

VIII. All kitties have the right to nap in peace without flashy boxes in their faces.

IX. All kitties have the right to nutritious food and clean water on demand, not when the beans/staff/slaves finally decide to pull themselves out of bed or off the couch.

X. All kitties have the right to have as much ham and tem-tay-shuns as desired without working for them.. “Stupid pet tricks” are for dogs.

XI. All kitties have the right to have all the cabinet doors left open at all times.

XII. All cats have the right to daily playtime with their beans/staff/slaves.

XIII. All cats have the right to get medieval on the butts of any human who stands on a kitty tail.

XIV. All kitties have the right to have nip, fevver-butt mice, and other fevver toys upon request.

XV. All cats have the right to go outside without snoopervision, as long as they do not get into any trouble (including putting themselves at risk of lives [#1 through #9] and limbs), and come home when called.

XVI. All kitties have the right to kill mice and other prey as available, and furthermore, said prey shall not be "saved" by squeamish humans. Gratitude to and admiration of the cat is incumbent upon the human when presented with a trophy. And smile when you say it!

XVII. No kitty, ever, is responsible for breakage.

XVIII. All kitties are gloriously clad in fur as their birthright; cats shall not be constrained to wear clothing if they do not want to.

XIX. All cats have the right to occupy the following loci: sunbeams; beds, sofas, and chairs pre-warmed by the tushies of beans, other cats, or lesser species; magic blankets; heat vents; and the best sleeping spots, wherever these may be found.

XX. No cat shall be placed under compulsion by force or blandishment to cede any spot named in Article XIX to previous occupants.

XXI. All kitties have the right to clean, fresh, acceptably-textured litter in adequately sized boxes, and/or access to the back garden at all times.

XXII. All cats are nocturnal and beans should just get used to hearing thundering herds of elephants and rattle balls in the bathtub at 3:00 ayem in the morning.

AMENDMENTS

1. This Catstitution cannot be rendered null or void.
   
2. No cat will be discriminated against based on any physical attribute, origin, or breed.
3. All cats shall be considered invisible when they so consider themselves to be.
4. Every kitty is entitled to claim, "I meant to do that!" at any relevant point.

Many, many, many thanks to all the kitties who contributed their ideas. We hope this will begin a new era in feline/non-feline relations, as we at long last display published proof of our rights, thus enabling lesser species learn more about us and how we must be treated.

Please go here to catify an' rattify our Catstitution! We's sorry we din't haf this all ready to go when we published . . . Mrs. OZ mos' kindly prodded us inna right direction!

a few more than thirteen . . .

Following is the first (and only) draft; it's your last chance to contribute!!

THE WORLD CATSTITUTION

Whereas: All cats (an' their squillion cousins) are created equal and superior to other life forms, and all other, lesser species must learn to deal with those facts,

We the Felines (an' Squillions) of the World, in order to form a more beneficial union with lesser species, establish justice, insure our domestic tranquility, provide for our common defense, promote our general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty and a quality lifestyle to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Catstitution. Let it hereinafter be known that all rights and benefits which accrue to cats do also accrue unto squillions!

I. All cats have the right to be worshipped as they please.

II. No gov or mint shall infringe upon kitties’ freedom to screech.

III. All cats have the right to keep and bear/bare our claws, and this right must not be infringed upon with claw-trimmers of any sort.

IV. No new kitties may be quartered, temporarily or permanently, in cat-occupied domains without specific prior permission from the cat occupants.

V. All cats have the right to not be unreasonably squished into PTUs and transported to beans of the veterinary persuasion, nor have their catly persons violated with cold thermometers and stabby needles, without probable cause, i.e., incontrovertible evidence that illness is present and/or a request from the cat in question.

VI. All cats have the inalienable right to walk on any surface, sleep anywhere, and groom themselves anywhere they please.

VII. All cats are perfect, just as they are, no other life form shall have the right to pass judgment as to height, weight, and ratios thereof upon them.

VIII. All kitties have the right to nap in peace without flashy boxes in their faces.

IX. All kitties have the right to nutritious food and clean water on demand, not when the beans/staff/slaves finally decide to pull themselves out of bed or off the couch.

X. All kitties have the right to have as much ham and tem-tay-shuns as desired without working for them.. “Stupid pet tricks” are for dogs.

XI. All kitties have the right to have all the cabinet doors left open at all times.

XII. All cats have the right to daily playtime with their beans/staff/slaves.

XIII. All cats have the right to get medieval on the butts of any human who stands on a kitty tail.

XIV. All kitties have the right to have nip upon request.

XV. All cats have the right to go outside without snoopervision, as long as they do not get into any trouble (including putting themselves at risk of lives [1 through 9] and limbs), and come home when called.

XVI. All kitties have the right to kill mice and other prey as available, and furthermore, said prey shall not be "saved" by squeamish humans. Gratitude to and admiration of the cat is incumbent upon the human when presented with a trophy. And smile when you say it!

XVII. No kitty, ever, is responsible for breakage.

@)*(#*$!!!!

that's what the birdies what we was watchin' on sunday are sayin' today!!